It is sad that I have to start by talking about my own experience of being a woman in a male-centric society. Sad, because we should've been able to move beyond this by 2017. But we haven't and it is not just true for a hypocritical and conservative society like Pakistan's but around the world even USA is stuck in an era where the burden of the proof still lies with a woman if she addresses any kind of unwanted advances by her male coworkers, class fellows or even complete strangers! Having breathed, studied and worked with men all of my educational and working life, i know the pressure of living with 'respectability'. Because after all, it is absolutely true, that 'only respectable women get respect'. And you have to, at all times, conform to what all that entails. For a free spirit like me, it has been crushing! But maintain it, i have! That also means that you are working at half the power and ability if you have to keep tabs on not letting slip that cloak! Your family background and name also protects you to some extent, but only to some! I have had my share of innuendos and unwanted passes and what have i done with those? Kept quiet. Because, 'only respectable women get respect'.
In Aisha Gullalai's case, the things that have been said about her, and sickeningly, her squash playing sister, since she has come out with her allegations about Imran Khan and others in the party are unquestionably below any standard of decency! She has, as yet, not divulged details but why do we expect her to do so on electronic and social media? She had to say why she was leaving the party and had to give a reason and she has, the details can come in the court (the most appropriate place) if she is sent a defamatory notice by Imran Khan's lawyers.
But more importantly, why do we continue to expect political leaders to be saints? Why do we portray them as such and why do they and their cronies perpetuate this portrayal? Why cant they subscribe to the adage 'that to err is (absolutely) human'. Since they don't subscribe to this, when they fall, they fall never to rise again and to be replaced instantly with another 'perfect' politician! We have done that to Jinnah, PPP does that to ZAB and Benazir Bhutto, PML(N) to Nawaz Sharif, the idiots to all military dictators and PTI to Imran Khan! It is a most unhealthy and unrealistic standard to maintain when you leave no room for mistakes in either your personal or political lives! And here i will resubmit my problem with the category of 'sadiq' and 'amin' (a terrible precedent set by the Supreme Court). It is absurd to say that our political leaders should be sadiq and amin when the system is so flawed that they cannot even reach that level unless they have be anything but! And as true for Imran Khan as any other politician as we will see soon enough. And secondly, is there any human that objectively and completely embodies these categories in all aspects and throughout his life? Where do you draw a line? These categories should have remained as ideals that we aspire to rather than some standard that politicians need to achieve to be eligible for public office.
Coming back to Aisha Gullalai, I hate watching the circus that we call talk shows in Pakistan, those hosts are desperate for TRP and would stoop to any level, irrespective of their credentials, for a scoop. But i did watch a clip shared by one of my Imran Khan 'lover' on my newsfeed on Facebook. The clip was from Dunya news, by Kamran Shahid with Naeem Bukhari as the guest. You can imagine the objectivity they must've demonstrated. It was quite revolting to see these men talk about the high (almost impossible) moral values of Imran Khan and naturally suggesting where Ms. Gullalai stands on this morality spectrum! Seriously? Irrespective of the authenticity of ms. Gulallai's claims, are we so out of touch with reality that we can not see this for what it is? Have values and principles become so subjective? What will we fall back on if we find ourselves in murky waters and need to revert to some thing that still remains untainted and lofty? It cannot be people but at least let ideas, values and principles stand apart from people!
In Aisha Gullalai's case, the things that have been said about her, and sickeningly, her squash playing sister, since she has come out with her allegations about Imran Khan and others in the party are unquestionably below any standard of decency! She has, as yet, not divulged details but why do we expect her to do so on electronic and social media? She had to say why she was leaving the party and had to give a reason and she has, the details can come in the court (the most appropriate place) if she is sent a defamatory notice by Imran Khan's lawyers.
But more importantly, why do we continue to expect political leaders to be saints? Why do we portray them as such and why do they and their cronies perpetuate this portrayal? Why cant they subscribe to the adage 'that to err is (absolutely) human'. Since they don't subscribe to this, when they fall, they fall never to rise again and to be replaced instantly with another 'perfect' politician! We have done that to Jinnah, PPP does that to ZAB and Benazir Bhutto, PML(N) to Nawaz Sharif, the idiots to all military dictators and PTI to Imran Khan! It is a most unhealthy and unrealistic standard to maintain when you leave no room for mistakes in either your personal or political lives! And here i will resubmit my problem with the category of 'sadiq' and 'amin' (a terrible precedent set by the Supreme Court). It is absurd to say that our political leaders should be sadiq and amin when the system is so flawed that they cannot even reach that level unless they have be anything but! And as true for Imran Khan as any other politician as we will see soon enough. And secondly, is there any human that objectively and completely embodies these categories in all aspects and throughout his life? Where do you draw a line? These categories should have remained as ideals that we aspire to rather than some standard that politicians need to achieve to be eligible for public office.
Coming back to Aisha Gullalai, I hate watching the circus that we call talk shows in Pakistan, those hosts are desperate for TRP and would stoop to any level, irrespective of their credentials, for a scoop. But i did watch a clip shared by one of my Imran Khan 'lover' on my newsfeed on Facebook. The clip was from Dunya news, by Kamran Shahid with Naeem Bukhari as the guest. You can imagine the objectivity they must've demonstrated. It was quite revolting to see these men talk about the high (almost impossible) moral values of Imran Khan and naturally suggesting where Ms. Gullalai stands on this morality spectrum! Seriously? Irrespective of the authenticity of ms. Gulallai's claims, are we so out of touch with reality that we can not see this for what it is? Have values and principles become so subjective? What will we fall back on if we find ourselves in murky waters and need to revert to some thing that still remains untainted and lofty? It cannot be people but at least let ideas, values and principles stand apart from people!
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